I'm sorry that they kept this hidden from you. My husband was infertile and we tried without success to do the sperm donor route. We later adopted. We told very few people about our attempts. It was just too personal. If you take an Ancestry DNA test or a Twenty-three and me test, you will find some of your family. You may find that you have a lot of brothers and sisters as well. There is nothing wrong with wanting to know about your origins.