I understand exactly what you are saying. And in regards to the church, I don't want to be a Baptist anymore because women are not allowed to have leadership roles. My sister is entrenched in this. I was helping her clear out books and she noticed one book by a famous female Christian writer and said, I don't want that. She's in trouble with the church for trying to be lead like a man. another time, we were at lunch, and she said the blessing.. then she said, oh, I messed up. I should have let your husband say it because men should always lead. I was shocked. I'm not going back to that faith.